When I walked back up the path twenty minutes later�察�I could feel a worm of hunger stirring in my belly�察�and thought I could eat something a little more substantial than toast。 A dish of oatmeal�察�perhaps even a scrambled egg with a sausage on the side。 I love sausage�察�always have�察�but if I eat more than one these days�察�I'm apt to get the squitters。 One would be safe enough�察�though。 Then�察�with my belly full and with the damp air still perking up my brain ��or so I hoped���察�I would go up to the solarium and write about the execution of Eduard Delacroix。 I would do it as fast as I could�察�so as not to lose my courage。
It was Mr。 Jingles I was thinking about as I crossed the croquet course to the kitchen door ´ how Percy Wetmore had stamped on him and broken his back�察�and how Delacroix had screamed when he realized what his enemy had done ´ and I didn't see Brad Dolan standing there�察�half´hidden by the Dumpster�察�until he reached out and grabbed my wrist。
;Out for a little stroll�察�Paulie�拭─�he asked。
I jerked back from him�察�yanking my wrist out of his hand。 Some of it was just being startled ´ anyone will jerk when they're startled ´ but that wasn't all of it。 I'd been thinking about Percy Wetmore�察�remember�察�and it's Percy that Brad always reminds me of。 Some of it's how Brad always goes around with a paperback stuffed into his pocket ��with Percy it was always a men's adventure magazine�察�with Brad it's books of jokes that are only funny if you're stupid and mean´hearted���察�some of it's how he acts like he's King Shit of Turd Mountain�察�but mostly it's that he's sneaky�察�and he likes to hurt。
He'd just gotten to work�察�I saw�察�hadn't even changed into his orderly's whites yet。 He was wearing jeans and a cheesy´looking Western´style shirt。 In one hand was the remains of a Danish he'd hooked out of the kitchen。 He'd been standing under the leave�察�eating it where he wouldn't get wet。 And where he could watch for me�察�I'm pretty sure of that now。 I'm pretty sure of something else�察�as well�此�I'll have to watch out for Mr。 Brad Dolan。 He doesn't like me much。 I don't know why�察�but I never knew why Percy Wetmore didn't like Delacroix�察�either。 And dislike is really too weak a word。 Percy hated Del's guts from the very first moment the little Frenchman came onto the Green Mile。
';What's with this poncho you got on�察�Paulie�拭─�he asked�察�flicking the collar。 ;This isn't yours。;
;I got it in the hall outside the kitchen�察─�I said。 I hate it when he calls me Paulie�察�and I think he knows it�察�but I was damned if I'd give him the satisfaction of seeing it。 ;There's a whole row of them。 I'm not hurting it any�察�would you say�拭�Rain's what it's made for�察�after all。;
;But it wasn't made for you�察�Paulie�察─�he said�察�giving it another little flick。 ;That's the thing。 Those slickers're for the employees�察�not the residents。;
;I still don't see what harm it does。;
He gave me a thin little smile。 ;It's not about harm�察�it's about the rules。 What would life be without rules�拭�Paulie�察�Paulie�察�Paulie。; He shook his head�察�as if just looking at me made him feel sorry to be alive。 ;You probably think an old fart like you doesn't have to mind about the rules anymore�察�but that's just not true。 Paulie。;
Smiling at me。 Disliking me。 Maybe even hating me。 And why�拭�I don't know。 Sometimes there is no why。 That's the scary part。
;Well�察�I'm sorry if I broke the rules�察─�I said。 It came out sounding whiney�察�a little shrill�察�and I hated myself for sounding that way�察�but I'm old�察�and old people whine easily。 Old people scare easily。
Brad nodded。 ;Apology accepted。 Now go hang that back up。 You got no business out walking in the rain�察�anyway。 Specially not in those woods。 What if you were to slip and fall and break your damned hip�拭�Huh�拭�Who do you think'd have to hoss your elderly freight back up the hill�拭─�
;I don't know�察─�I said。 I just wanted to get away from him。 The more I listened to him�察�the more he sounded like Percy。 William Wharton�察�the crazyman who came to the Green Mile in the fall of `32�察�once grabbed Percy and scared him so bad that Percy squirted in his pants。 You talk about this to anyone�察�Percy told the rest of us afterward�察�and you'll all be on the breadlines in a week。 Now�察�these many years later�察�I could almost hear Brad Dolan saying those same words�察�in that same tone of voice。 It's as if�察�by writing about those old times�察�I have unlocked some unspeakable door that connects the past to the present ´ Percy Wetmore to Brad Dolan�察�Janice Edgebe to Elaine Connelly�察�Cold Mountain Penitentiary to the Georgia Pines old folks' home。 And if that thought doesn't keep me awake tonight�察�I guess nothing will。
I made as if to go in through the kitchen door and Brad grabbed me by the wrist again。 I don't know about the first one�察�but this time he was doing it on purpose�察�squeezing to hurt。 His eyes shifting back and forth�察�making sure no one was around in the early´morning wet�察�no one to see he was abusing one of the old folks he was supposed to be taking care of。
;What do you do down that path�拭─�he asked。 ;I know you don't go down there and jerk off�察�those days are long behind you�察�so what do you do�拭─�
;Nothing�察─�I said�察�telling myself to be calm�察�not to show him how bad he was hurting me and to be calm�察�to remember he'd only mentioned the path�察�he didn't know about the shed。 ;I just walk。 To clear my mind;
;Too late for that�察�Paulie�察�your mind's never gonna be clear again��' He squeezed my thin old mares wrist again�察�grinding the brittle bones�察�eyes continually shifting from side to side�察�wanting to make sure he was safe。 Brad wasn't afraid of breaking the rules�察�he was only afraid of being caught breaking them。 And in that�察�too�察�he was like Percy Wetmore�察�who would never let you forget he was the governor's nephew。 ;Old as you are�察�its a miracle you can remember who you are。 You're too goddam old。 Even for a museum like this。 You give me the fucking creeps�察�Paulie。;
;Let go of me�察─�I said�察�trying to keep the whine out of my voice。 It wasn't just pride�察�either。 I thought if he heard it�察�it might inflame him�察�the way the smell of sweat can sometimes inflame a bad´tempered dog ´ one which would otherwise only growl ´ to bite。 That made me think of a reporter who'd covered John Coffey's trial。 The reporter was a terrible man named Hammersmith�察�and the most terrible thing about him was that he hadn't known he was terrible。
Instead of letting go�察�Dolan squeezed my wrist again。 I groaned。 I didn't want to�察�but I couldn't help it。 It hurt all the way down to my ankles。
;What do you do down there�察�Paulie�拭�Tell me。;
;Nothing� ─�I said。 I wasn't crying�察�not yet�察�but I was afraid I'd start soon if he kept bearing down like that。 ;Nothing�察�I just walk�察�I like to walk�察�let go of me� ─�
He did�察�but only long enough so he could grab my other hand。 That one was rolled closed。 ;Open up�察─�he said。 ;Let Poppa see。;
I did�察�and he grunted with disgust。 It was nothing but the remains of my second piece of toast。 I'd clenched it in my right hand y left wrist�察�and there was butter ´ well�察�oleo�察�they don't have real butter here�察�of course ´ on my fingers。
;Go on inside and wash your damned hands�察─�he said�察�stepping back and taking another bite of his Danish。 ;Jesus Christ。;
I went up the steps。 My legs were shaking�察�my heart pounding like an engine with leaky valves and shaky old pistons。 As I grasped the knob that would let me into the kitchen ´ and safety ´ Dolan said�此 �If you tell anyone I squeezed your po' old wrist�察�Paulie�察�I'll tell them you're having delusions。 Onset of senile dementia�察�likely。 And you know they'll believe me。 If there are bruises�察�they'll think you made them yourself。;
Yes。 Those things were true。 And once again�察�it could have been Percy Wetmore saying them�察�a Percy that had somehow stayed young and mean while I'd grown old and brittle。
;I'm not going to say anything to anyone�察─�I mutered。 ;Got nothing to say。;
;That's right�察�you old sweetie。; His voice light and mocking�察�the voice of a lugoon ��to use Percy's word�� who thought he was going to be young forever。 ;And I'm going to find out what you're up to。 I'm going to make it my business。 You hear�拭─�
I heard�察�all right�察�but wouldn't give him the satisfaction of saying so。 I went in�察�passed through the kitchen ��I could now smell eggs and sausage cooking�察�but no longer wanted any���察�and hung the poncho back up on its hook。 Then I went upstairs to my room ´ resting at every step�察�giving my heart time to slow ´ and gathered my writing materials together。
I went down to the solarium and was just sitting at the little table by the windows when my friend Elaine poked her head in。 She looked tired�察�and�察�I thought�察�unwell。 She'd bed her hair out but was still in her robe。 We old sweeties don't stand much on ceremony�察�for the most part�察�we can't afford to。
;I won't disturb you�察─�she said�察 �I see you're getting set to write´;
;Don't be silly�察─�I said。 ;I've got more time than Carter's got liver pills。 e on in。;
She did�察�but stood by the door。 ;It's just that I couldn't sleep ´ again ´ and happened to be looking out my window a little earlier 。。。 and 。。。;
;And you saw Mr。 Dolan and me having our pleasant little chat�察─�I said。 I hoped seeing was all she'd done�察�that her window had been closed and she hadn't heard me whining to be let go。
;It didn't look pleasant and it didn't look friendly�察─�she said。 ;Paul�察�that Mr。 Dolan's been asking around about you。 He asked me about you ´ last week�察�this was。 I didn't think much about it then�察�just that he's got himself a nasty long nose for other people's business�察�but now I wonder。;
;Asking about me�拭─�I hoped I didn't sound as uneasy as I felt。 ;Asking what�拭─�
;Where you go walking�察�for one thing。 And why you go walking。;
I tried to laugh。 ;There's a man who doesn't believe in exercise�察�that much is clear。;
;He thinks you've got a secret。; She paused。 ;So do I。;
I opened my mouth ´ to say what�察�I don't know ´ but Elaine raised one of her gnarled but oddly beautiful hands before I could get a single word out。 ;If you do�察�I don't want to know what it is�察�Paul。 Your business is your business。 I was raised to think that way�察�but not everyone was。 Be careful。 That's all I want to tell you。 And now I'll let you alone to