arminder to flaunt her sari in church。 It was not as though Parminder did not have normal clothes； for she wore them to work every day。 The double standard of it all was what rankled； not a thought for the disrespect it showed to their religion； and； by extension； to Barry Fairbrother himself； of whom she was supposed to have been so fond。
Shirley unclasped her hands； raised her head； and gave her attention over to the outfits of people who were passing； and of the size and number of Barry’s floral tributes。 Some of these had been heaped up against the munion rail。 Shirley spotted the offering from the council； for which she and Howard had organized the collection。 It was a large； round traditional wreath of white and blue flowers； which were the colours of Pagford’s arms。 Their flowers and all the other wreaths were overshadowed by the life…sized oar； made of bronze chrysanthemums； which the girls’ rowing team had given。
Sukhvinder turned in her pew to look for Lauren； whose florist mother had made the oar； she wanted to mime that she had seen it and liked it； but the crowd was dense and she could not spot Lauren anywhere。 Sukhvinder was mournfully proud that they had done it； especially when she saw that people were pointing it out to each other as they settled themselves in their seats。 Five of the eight girls on the team had stumped up money for the oar。 Lauren had told Sukhvinder how she had tracked down Krystal Weedon at lunchtime； and exposed herself to the piss…taking of Krystal’s friends； who were sitting smoking on a low wall by the newsagent’s。 Lauren had asked Krystal if she wanted to chip in。 ‘Yeah； I will； all righ’；’ Krystal had said； but she had not； so her name was not on the card。 Nor； as far as Sukhvinder could see； had Krystal e to the funeral。
Sukhvinder’s insides were like lead； but the ache of her left forearm coupled with the sharp twinges of pain when she moved it was a counter…irritant； and at least Fats Wall； glowering in his black suit； was nowhere near her。 He had not made eye contact with her when their two families had met； briefly； in the churchyard； he was restrained by the presence of their parents； as he was sometimes restrained by the presence of Andrew Price。
Late the previous evening； her anonymous cyber…torturer had sent her a black and white picture of a naked Victorian child； covered in soft dark hair。 She had seen it and deleted it while dressing for the funeral。
When had she last been happy？ She knew that in a different life； long before anyone had grunted at her； she had sat in this church； and been quite content for years； she had sung hymns with gusto at Christmas； Easter and Harvest Festival。 She had always liked St Michael； with his pretty； feminine； Pre…Raphaelite face； his curly golden hair … but this morning； for the first time； she saw him differently； with his foot resting almost casually on that writhing dark devil； she found his untroubled expression sinister and arrogant。
The pews were packed。 Muffled clunks； echoing footsteps and quiet rustlings animated the dusty air as the unlucky ones continued to file in at the back of the church and took up standing room along the left…hand wall。 Some hopeful souls tiptoed down the aisle in case of an overlooked place in the crammed pews。 Howard remained immovable and firm； until Shirley tapped his shoulder and whispered； ‘Aubrey and Julia！’
At which Howard turned massively； and waved the service sheet to attract the Fawleys’ attention。 They came briskly down the carpeted aisle： Aubrey； tall； thin and balding in his dark suit； Julia with her light…red hair pulled back into a chignon。 They smiled their thanks as Howard moved along； shunting the others up； making sure that the Fawleys had plenty of room。
Samantha was jammed so tightly between Miles and Maureen that she could feel Maureen’s sharp hip joint pressing into her flesh on one side and the keys in Miles’ pocket on the other。 Furious； she attempted to secure herself a centimetre or so more room； but neither Miles nor Maureen had anywhere else to go； so she stared straight ahead； and turned her thoughts vengefully to Vikram； who had lost none of his appeal in the month or so since she had last seen him。 He was so conspicuously； irrefutably good…looking； it was silly； it made you want to laugh。 With his long legs and his broad shoulders； and the flatness of his belly where his shirt tucked into his trousers； and those dark eyes with the thick black lashes； he looked like a god pared to other Pagford men； who were so slack and pallid and porky。 As Miles leaned forward to exchange whispered pleasantries with Julia Fawley； his keys ground painfully into Samantha’s upper thigh； and she imagined Vikram ripping open the navy wrap dress she was wearing； and in her fantasy she had omitted to put on the matching camisole that concealed her deep canyon of cleavage …
The organ stops creaked and silence fell； except for a soft persistent rustle。 Heads turned： the coffin was ing up the aisle。
The pall…bearers were almost ically mismatched： Barry’s brothers were both five foot six； and Colin Wall； at the rear； six foot two； so that the back end of the coffin was considerably higher than the front。 The coffin itself was not made of polished mahogany； but of wickerwork。
It’s a bloody picnic basket！ thought Howard； outraged。
Looks of surprise flitted across many faces as the willow box passed them； but some had known all about the coffin in advance。 Mary had told Tessa （who had told Parminder） how the choice of material had been made by Fergus； Barry’s eldest son； who wanted willow because it was a sustainable； quick…growing material and therefore environmentally friendly。 Fergus was a passionate enthusiast for all things green and ecologically sound。
Parminder liked the willow coffin better； much better； than the stout wooden box in which most English disposed of their dead。 Her grandmother had always had a superstitious fear of the soul being trapped inside something heavy and solid； deploring the way that British undertakers nailed down the lids。 The pall…bearers lowered the coffin onto the brocade…draped bier and retreated： Barry’s son； brothers and brother…in…law edged into the front pews； and Colin walked jerkily back to join his family。
For two quaking seconds Gavin hesitated。 Parminder could tell that he was unsure of where to go； his only option to walk back down the aisle under the eyes of three hundred people。 But Mary must have made a sign to him； because he ducked； blushing furiously； into the front pew beside Barry’s mother。 Parminder had only ever spoken to Gavin when she had tested and treated him for chlamydia。 He had never met her gaze again。
‘I am the resurrection and the life； saith the Lord； he that believeth in me； though he were dead； yet shall he live： and whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die …’
The vicar did not sound as if he were thinking about the sense of the words issuing from his mouth； but only about his own delivery； which was sing…song and rhythmic。 Parminder was familiar with his style； she had attended carol services for years with all the other St Thomas’s parents。 Long acquaintance had not reconciled her to the white…faced warrior saint staring down at her； nor all the dark wood； the hard pews； the alien altar with its jewelled golden cross； nor the dirgey hymns； which she found chilly and unsettling。
So she withdrew her attention from the self…conscious drone of the vicar and thought again of her father。 She had seen him out of the kitchen window； flat on his face； while her radio continued to blare from on top of the rabbit hutch。 He had been lying there for two hours while she； her mother and her sisters had been browsing in Topshop。 She could still feel her father’s shoulder beneath his hot shirt as she had shaken it。 ‘Dadiii。 Dadiiiii。’
They had scattered Darshan’s ashes in the sad little River Rea in Birmingham。 Parminder could remember the dull clay look of its surface； on an overcast day in June； and the stream of tiny white and grey flakes floating away from her。
The organ clunked and wheezed into life； and she got to her feet with everybody else。 She caught a glimpse of the backs of Niamh and Siobhan’s red…gold heads； they were exactly the age she had been when Darshan had been taken from them。 Parminder experienced a rush of tenderness； and an awful ache； and a confused desire to hold them and to tell them that she knew； she knew； she understood …
Morning has broken； like the first morning …
Gavin could hear a shrill treble from along the row： Barry’s younger son’s voice had not yet broken。 He knew that Declan had chosen the hymn。 That was another of the ghastly details of the service that Mary had chosen to share with him。
He was finding the funeral an even worse ordeal than he had expected。 He thought it might have been better with a wooden coffin； he had had an awful； visceral awareness of Barry’s body inside that light wickerwork case； the physical weight of him was shocking。 All those placently staring people； as he walked up the aisle； did they not understand what he was actually carrying？
Then had e the ghastly moment when he had realized that nobody had saved him a place； and that he would have to walk all the way back again while everybody stared； and hide among the standees at the back … but instead he had been forced to sit in the first pew； horribly exposed。 It was like being in the front seat of a rollercoaster； bearing the brunt of every awful twist and lurch。
Sitting there； mere feet from Siobhan’s sunflower； its head as big as a saucepan lid； in the middle of a big burst of yellow freesias and daylilies； he actually wished that Kay had e with him； he could not believe it； but there it was。 He would have been consoled by the presence of somebody who was on his side； somebody simply to keep him a seat。 He had not considered what a sad bastard he might look； turning up alone。
The hymn ended。 Barry’s older brother walked to the front to speak。 Gavin did not know how he could bear to do it； with Barry’s corpse lying right in front of him beneath the sunflower （grown from seed； over months）； nor how Mary could sit so quietly