;Are the rest of them ing back now�拭─�he asked in a cool�察�quiet voice。 It
reminded me of Sam's
always calm manner。 Jacob was being more like Sam I wondered why that
bothered me so much。
Now I didn't speak。 He looked back at my face with probing eyes。
;Well�拭─�he asked。 He struggled to conceal the tension behind his serene
expression。
;No。; I said finally。 Grudgingly。 ;They aren't ing back。;
His expression didn't change。 ;Okay。 That's all。;
I glared at him�察�annoyance rekindled。 ;Well�察�run along now。 Go tell Sam that
the scary monsters aren't
ing to get you。;
;Okay�察─�he repeated�察�still calm。
That seemed to be it。 Jacob walked swiftly from the kitchen。 I waited to hear
the front door open�察�but I
heard nothing。 I could hear the clock over the stove ticking�察�and I marveled
again at how quiet he'd
bee。
What a disaster。 How could I have alienated him so pletely in such a short
amount of time�拭�
Would he forgive me when Alice was gone�拭�What if he didn't�拭�
I slumped against the counter and buried my face in my hands。 How had I made
such a mess of
everything�拭�But what could I have done differently�拭�Even in hindsight�察�I
couldn't think of any better way�察�
any perfect course of action。
;Bella �拭─�Jacob asked in a troubled voice。
I pulled my face out of my hands to see Jacob hesitating in the kitchen
doorway�察�he hadn't left when I'd
thought。 It was only when I saw the clear drops sparkling in my hands that I
realized I was crying。
Jacob's calm expression was gone�察�his face was anxious and unsure。 He walked
quickly back to stand in
front of me�察�ducking his head so that his eyes were closer to being on the
same level with mine。
;Did it again�察�didn't I�拭─�
;Did what�拭─�I asked�察�my voice cracking。
;Broke my promise。 Sorry。;
;'S'okay�察─�I mumbled。 ;I started it this time。;
His face twisted。 ;I knew how you felt about them。 It shouldn't have taken me
by surprise like that。;
I could see the revulsion in his eyes。 I wanted to explain to him what Alice
was really like�察�to defend her
against the judgments he'd made�察�but something warned me that now was not the
time。
So I just said�察 �Sorry�察─�again。
;Let's not worry about it�察�okay�拭�She's just visiting�察�right�拭�She'll leave�察�and
things will go back to normal。;
;Can't I be friends with you both at the same time�拭─�I asked�察�my voice not
hiding an ounce of the hurt I
felt。
He shook his head slowly。 ;No�察�I don't think you can。;
I sniffed and stared at his big feet。 ;But you'll wait�察�right�拭�You'll still be
my friend�察�even though I love
Alice�察�too�拭─�
I didn't look up�察�afraid to see what he'd think of that last part。 It took him
a minute to answer�察�so I was
probably right not to look。
;Yeah�察�I'll always be your friend�察─�he said gruffly。 ;No matter what you
love。;
;Promise�拭─�
;Promise。;
I felt his arms wind around me�察�and I leaned against his chest�察�still
sniffling。 ;This sucks。;
;Yeah。; Then he sniffed my hair and said�察 �Ew。;
;What�拭─�I demanded。 I looked up to see that his nose was wrinkled again。 ;Why
does everyone keep
doing that to me�拭�I don't smell� ─�
He smiled a little。 ;Yes�察�you do!you smell like them。 Blech。 Too sweet!
sickly sweet。 And icy。 It
burns my nose。;
;Really�拭─�That was strange。 Alice smelled unbelievably wonderful。 To a human�察�
anyway。 ;But why would
Alice think I smelled�察�too�察�then�拭─�
That wiped his smile away。 ;Huh。 Maybe I don't smell so good to her�察�either。
Huh。;
;Well�察�you both smell fine to me。; I rested my head against him again。 I was
going to miss him terribly
when he walked out my door。 It was a nasty catch´22!on the one hand�察�I wanted
Alice to stay forever。
I was going to die!metaphorically!when she left me。 But how was I supposed
to go without seeing
Jake for any length of time�拭�What a mess�察�I thought again。
;I'll miss you�察─�Jacob whispered�察�echoing my thoughts。 ;Every minute。 I hope
she leaves soon。;
;It really doesn't have to be that way�察�Jake。;
He sighed。 ;Yes�察�it really does。 Bella。 You love her。 So I'd better not get
anywhere near her。 I'm not
sure that I'm even´tempered enough to handle that。 Sam would be mad if I broke
the treaty�察�and;!his
voice turned sarcastic!;you probably wouldn't like it too much if I killed
your friend。;
I recoiled from him when he said that�察�but he only tightened his arms�察�
refusing to let me escape。 ;There's
no point in avoiding the truth。 That's the way things are�察�Bells。;
;I do not like the way things are。;
Jacob freed one arm so that he could cup his big brown hand under my chin and
make me look at him。
;Yeah。 It was easier when we were both human�察�wasn't it�拭─�
I sighed。
We stared at each other for a long moment。 His hand smoldered against my skin。
In my face�察�I knew
there was nothing but wistful sadness!I didn't want to have to say goodbye
now�察�no matter for how
short a time。 At first his face reflected mine�察�but then�察�as neither of us
looked away�察�his expression
changed。
He released me�察�lifting his other hand to brush his fingertips along my cheek�察�
trailing them down to my
jaw。 I could feel his fingers tremble!not with anger this time。 He pressed
his palm against my cheek�察�so
that my face was trapped between his burning hands。
;Bella�察─�he whispered。
I was frozen。
No� �I hadn't made this decision yet。 I didn't know if I could do this�察�and now
I was out of time to think。
But I would have been a fool if I thought rejecting him now would have no
consequences。
I stared back at him。 He was not my Jacob�察�but he could be。 His face was
familiar and beloved。 In so
many real ways�察�I did love him。 He was my fort�察�my safe harbor。 Right now�察�
I could choose to have
him belong to me。
Alice was back for the moment�察�but that changed nothing。 True love was forever
lost。 The prince was
never ing back to kiss me awake from my enchanted sleep。 I was not a
princess�察�after all。 So what
was the fairy´tale protocol for other kisses�拭�The mundane kind that didn't
break any spells�拭�
Maybe it would be easy!like holding his hand or having his arms around me。
Maybe it would feel nice。
Maybe it wouldn't feel like a betrayal。 Besides�察�who was I betraying�察�anyway�拭�
Just myself。
Keeping his eyes on mine�察�Jacob began to bend his face toward me。 And I was
still absolutely
undecided。
The shrill ring of the phone made us both jump�察�but it did not break his
focus。 He took his hand from
under my chin and reached over me to grab the receiver�察�but still held my face
securely with the hand
against my cheek。 His dark eyes did not free mine。 I was too muddled to react�察�
even to take advantage
of the distraction。
;Swan residence�察─�Jacob said�察�his husky voice low and intense。
Someone answered�察�and Jacob altered in an instant。 He straightened up�察�and his
hand dropped from my
face。 His eyes went flat�察�his face blank�察�and I would have bet the measly
remainder of my college f and
that it was Alice。
I recovered myself and held out my hand for the phone。 Jacob ignored me。
;He's not here�察─�Jacob said�察�and the words were menacing。
There was some very short reply�察�a request for more information it seemed�察�
because he added
unwillingly�察 �He's at the funeral。;
Then Jacob hung up the phone。 ;Filthy bloodsucker�察─�he muttered under his
breath。 The face he turned
back to me was the bitter mask again。
;Who did you just hang up on�拭─�I gasped�察�infuriated。 ;In my house�察�and on my
phone�拭─�
;Easy� �He hung up on me� ─�
;He�拭�Who was it�殖 ─�
He sneered the title。 ;Dr。 Carlisle Cullen。;
;Why didn't you let me talk to him�殖 ─�
;He didn't ask for you�察─�Jacob said coldly。 His face was smooth�察�
expressionless�察�but his hands shook。
;He asked where Charlie was and I told him。 I don't think I broke any rules of
etiquette。;
;You listen to me�察�Jacob Black!;
But he obviously wasn't listening。 He looked quickly over his shoulder�察�as if
someone had called his name
from the other room。 His eyes went wide and his body stiff�察�then he started
trembling。 I listened too�察�
automatically�察�but heard nothing。
;Bye�察�Bells�察─�he spit out�察�and wheeled toward the front door。
I ran after him。 ;What is it�拭─�
And then I ran into him�察�as he rocked back on his heels�察�cussing under his
breath。 He spun around again�察�
knocking me sideways。 I bobbled and fell to the floor�察�my legs tangled with
his。
;Shoot�察�ow� ─�I protested as he hurriedly jerked his legs free one at a time。
I struggled to pull myself up as he darted for the back door�察�he suddenly
froze again。
Alice stood motionless at the foot of the stairs。
;Bella�察─�she choked。
I scrambled to my feet and lurched to her side。 Her eyes were dazed and far
away�察�her face drawn and
whiter than bone。 Her slim body trembled to an inner turmoil。
;Alice�察�what's wrong�拭─�I cried。 I put my hands on her face�察�trying to calm
her。
Her eyes focused on mine abruptly�察�wide with pain。
;Edward�察─�was all she whispered。
My body reacted faster than my mind was able to catch up with the implications
of her reply。 I didn't at
first understand why the room was spinning or where the hollow roar in my ears
was ing from。 My
mind labored�察�unable to make sense of Alice's bleak face and how it could
possibly relate to Edward�察�
while my body was already swaying�察�seeking the relief of unconsciousness
before the reality could hit me。
The stairway tilted at the oddest angle。
Jacob's furious voice was suddenly in my ear�察�hissing out a stream of
profanities。 I felt a vague
disapproval。 His new friends were clearly a bad influence。
I was on the couch without understanding how I got there�察�and Jacob was still
swearing。 It felt like there
was an earthquake!the couch was shaking under me。
;What did you do to her�拭─�he demanded。
Alice ignored him。 ;Bella�拭�Bella�察�snap out of it。 We have to hurry。;
;Stay back�察─�Jacob warned。
;Calm down�察�Jacob Black�察─�Alice ordered。 ;You don't want to do that so close
to her。;
;I don't think I'll have any problem keeping my focus�察─�he retorted�察�but his
voice sounded a little cooler。
;Alice�拭─�My voice was weak。 ;What happened�拭─�I asked�察�even though I didn't
want to hear。
;I don't know�察─�she suddenly wailed。 ;What is he thinking�殖 ─�
I