as I breathed in his heady scent。
Immediately I felt him turn to unresponsive stone beneath my lips。 His
hands gently； but with irresistible force； pushed my face back。 I opened
my eyes and saw his guarded expression。
〃Oops；〃 I breathed。
〃That's an understatement。〃
His eyes were wild； his jaw clenched in acute restraint； yet he didn't
lapse from his perfect articulation。 He held my face just inches from
his。 He dazzled my eyes。
〃Should I… ？〃 I tried to disengage myself； to give him some room。
His hands refused to let me move so much as an inch。
〃No； it's tolerable。 Wait for a moment； please。〃 His voice was polite；
controlled。
I kept my eyes on his； watched as the excitement in them faded and
gentled。
Then he smiled a surprisingly impish grin。
〃There；〃 he said； obviously pleased with himself。
〃Tolerable？〃 I asked。
He laughed aloud。 〃I'm stronger than I thought。 It's nice to know。〃
〃I wish I could say the same。 I'm sorry。〃
〃You are only human； after all。〃
〃Thanks so much；〃 I said； my voice acerbic。
He was on his feet in one of his lithe； almost invisibly quick movements。
He held out his hand to me； an unexpected gesture。 I was so used to our
standard of careful noncontact。 I took his icy hand； needing the support
more than I thought。 My balance had not yet returned。
〃Are you still faint from the run？ Or was it my kissing expertise？〃 How
lighthearted； how human he seemed as he laughed now； his seraphic face
untroubled。 He was a different Edward than the one I had known。 And I
felt all the more besotted by him。 It would cause me physical pain to be
separated from him now。
〃I can't be sure； I'm still woozy；〃 I managed to respond。 〃I think it's
some of both； though。〃
〃Maybe you should let me drive。〃
〃Are you insane？〃 I protested。
〃I can drive better than you on your best day；〃 he teased。 〃You have much
slower reflexes。〃
〃I'm sure that's true； but I don't think my nerves； or my truck； could
take it。〃
〃Some trust； please； Bella。〃
My hand was in my pocket； curled tightly around the key。 I pursed my
lips； deliberated； then shook my head with a tight grin。
〃Nope。 Not a chance。〃
He raised his eyebrows in disbelief。
I started to step around him； heading for the driver's side。 He might
have let me pass if I hadn't wobbled slightly。 Then again； he might not
have。 His arm created an inescapable snare around my waist。
〃Bella； I've already expended a great deal of personal effort at this
point to keep you alive。 I'm not about to let you behind the wheel of a
vehicle when you can't even walk straight。 Besides； friends don't let
friends drive drunk；〃 he quoted with a chuckle。 I could smell the
unbearably sweet fragrance ing off his chest。
〃Drunk？〃 I objected。
〃You're intoxicated by my very presence。〃 He was grinning that playful
smirk again。
〃I can't argue with that；〃 I sighed。 There was no way around it； I
couldn't resist him in anything。 I held the key high and dropped it；
watching his hand flash like lightning to catch it soundlessly。 〃Take it
easy — my truck is a senior citizen。〃
〃Very sensible；〃 he approved。
〃And are you not affected at all？〃 I asked； irked。 〃By my presence？〃
Again his mobile features transformed； his expression became soft； warm。
He didn't answer at first； he simply bent his face to mine； and brushed
his lips slowly along my jaw； from my ear to my chin； back and forth。 I
trembled。
〃Regardless；〃 he finally murmured； 〃I have better reflexes。〃
===========================================================================
14。 MIND OVER MATTER
He could drive well； when he kept the speed reasonable； I had to admit。
Like so many things； it seemed to be effortless to him。 He barely looked
at the road； yet the tires never deviated so much as a centimeter from
the center of the lane。 He drove onehanded； holding my hand on the seat。
Sometimes he gazed into the setting sun； sometimes he glanced at me — my
face； my hair blowing out the open window； our hands twined together。
He had turned the radio to an oldies station； and he sang along with a
song I'd never heard。 He knew every line。
〃You like fifties music？〃 I asked。
〃Music in the fifties was good。 Much better than the sixties； or the
seventies； ugh！〃 He shuddered。 〃The eighties were bearable。〃
〃Are you ever going to tell me how old you are？〃 I asked； tentative； not
wanting to upset his buoyant humor。
〃Does it matter much？〃 His smile； to my relief； remained unclouded。
〃No； but I still wonder…〃 I grimaced。 〃There's nothing like an unsolved
mystery to keep you up at night。〃
〃I wonder if it will upset you；〃 he reflected to himself。 He gazed into
the sun； the minutes passed。
〃Try me；〃 I finally said。
He sighed； and then looked into my eyes； seeming to forget the road
pletely for a time。 Whatever he saw there must have encouraged him。 He
looked into the sun — the light of the setting orb glittered off his skin
in rubytinged sparkles — and spoke。
〃I was born in Chicago in 1901。〃 He paused and glanced at me from the
corner of his eyes。 My face was carefully unsurprised； patient for the
rest。 He smiled a tiny smile and continued。 〃Carlisle found me in a
hospital in the summer of 1918。 I was seventeen； and dying of the Spanish
influenza。〃
He heard my intake of breath； though it was barely audible to my own
ears。 He looked down into my eyes again。
〃I don't remember it well — it was a very long time ago； and human
memories fade。〃 He was lost in his thoughts for a short time before he
went on。 〃I do remember how it felt； when Carlisle saved me。 It's not an
easy thing； not something you could forget。〃
〃Your parents？〃
〃They had already died from the disease。 I was alone。 That was why he
chose me。 In all the chaos of the epidemic； no one would ever realize I
was gone。〃
〃How did he… save you？〃
A few seconds passed before he answered。 He seemed to choose his words
carefully。
〃It was difficult。 Not many of us have the restraint necessary to
acplish it。 But Carlisle has always been the most humane； the most
passionate of us… I don't think you could find his equal throughout
all of history。〃 He paused。 〃For me； it was merely very； very painful。〃
I could tell from the set of his lips； he would say no more on this
subject。 I suppressed my curiosity； though it was far from idle。 There
were many things I needed to think through on this particular issue；
things that were only beginning to occur to me。 No doubt his quick mind
had already prehended every aspect that eluded me。
His soft voice interrupted my thoughts。 〃He acted from loneliness。 That's
usually the reason behind the choice。 I was the first in Carlisle's
family； though he found Esme soon after。 She fell from a cliff。 They
brought her straight to the hospital morgue； though； somehow； her heart
was still beating。〃
〃So you must be dying； then； to bee…〃 We never said the word； and I
couldn't frame it now。
〃No； that's just Carlisle。 He would never do that to someone who had
another choice。〃 The respect in his voice was profound whenever he spoke
of his father figure。 〃It is easier he says； though；〃 he continued； 〃if
the blood is weak。〃 He looked at the nowdark road； and I could feel the
subject closing again。
〃And Emmett and Rosalie？〃
〃Carlisle brought Rosalie to our family next。 I didn't realize till much
later that he was hoping she would be to me what Esme was to him — he was
careful with his thoughts around me。〃 He rolled his eyes。 〃But she was
never more than a sister。 It was only two years later that she found
Emmett。 She was hunting — we were in Appalachia at the time — and found a
bear about to finish him off。 She carried him back to Carlisle； more than
a hundred miles； afraid she wouldn't be able to do it herself。 I'm only
beginning to guess how difficult that journey was for her。〃 He threw a
pointed glance in my direction； and raised our hands； still folded
together； to brush my cheek with the back of his hand。
〃But she made it；〃 I encouraged； looking away from the unbearable beauty
of his eyes。
〃Yes；〃 he murmured。 〃She saw something in his face that made her strong
enough。 And they've been together ever since。 Sometimes they live
separately from us； as a married couple。 But the younger we pretend to
be； the longer we can stay in any given place。 Forks seemed perfect； so
we all enrolled in high school。〃 He laughed。 〃I suppose we'll have to go
to their wedding in a few years； again。〃
〃Alice and Jasper？〃
〃Alice and Jasper are two very rare creatures。 They both developed a
conscience； as we refer to it； with no outside guidance。 Jasper belonged
to another… family； a very different kind of family。 He became depressed；
and he wandered on his own。 Alice found him。 Like me； she has certain
gifts above and beyond the norm for our kind。〃
〃Really？〃 I interrupted； fascinated。 〃But you said you were the only one
who could hear people's thoughts。〃
〃That's true。 She knows other things。 She sees things — things that might
happen； things that are ing。 But it's very subjective。 The future
isn't set in stone。 Things change。〃
His jaw set when he said that； and his eyes darted to my face and away so
quickly that I wasn't sure if I only imagined it。
〃What kinds of things does she see？〃
〃She saw Jasper and knew that he was looking for her before he knew it
himself。 She saw Carlisle and our family； and they came together to find
us。 She's most sensitive to nonhumans。 She always sees； for example；
when another group of our kind is ing near。 And any threat they may
pose。〃
〃Are there a lot of… your kind？〃 I was surprised。 How many of them could
walk among us undetected？
〃No； not many。 But most won't settle in any one place。 Only those like
us； who've given up hunting you people〃 — a sly glance in my direction —
〃can live together with humans for any length of time。 We've only found
one other family like ours； in a small village in Alaska。 We lived
together for a time； but there