pe； and heard her internal surprise at the change in my expression。 She shrank away from me； but her fear did not form into coherent words。 Using all the control I d mastered in my decades of selfdenial； I made my voice even and smooth。 There was just enough air left in my lungs to speak once more； rushing through the words。 Nevermind； then。 I can see that it s impossible。 Thank you so much for your
help。 I spun and launched myself from the room； trying not to feel the warmblooded heat of the girl s body as I passed within inches of it。 I didn t stop until I was in my car； moving too fast the entire way there。 Most of the humans had cleared out already； so there weren t a lot of witnesses。 I heard a sophomore； D。J。 Garrett； notice； and then disregard Where did Cullen e from it was like he just came out of thin air with the imagination again。 Mom always says There I go； When I slid into my Volvo； the others were already there。 I tried to control my breathing； but I was gasping at the fresh air like I d been suffocated。 Edward？ Alice asked； alarm in her voice。 I just shook my head at her。 What the hell happened to you？ Emmett demanded； distracted； for the moment； from the fact that Jasper was not in the mood for his rematch。 Instead of answering； I threw the car into reverse。 I had to get out of this lot before Bella Swan could follow me here； too。 My own person demon； haunting me I swung the car around and accelerated。 I hit forty before I was on the road。 On the road； I hit seventy before I made the corner。 Without looking； I knew that Emmett； Rosalie and Jasper had all turned to stare at Alice。 She shrugged。 She couldn t see what had passed； only what was ing。 She looked ahead for me now。 were both surprised。 We both processed what she saw in her head； and we You re leaving？ she whispered。 The others stared at me now。 Am I？ I hissed through my teeth。 She saw it then； as my resolve wavered and another choice spun my future in a darker direction。 Oh。 Bella Swan； dead。 My eyes； glowing crimson with fresh blood。 The search that would follow。 The careful time we would wait before it was safe for us to pull out and start again Oh； she said again。 The picture grew more specific。 I saw the inside of Chief Swan s house for the first time； saw Bella in a small kitchen with the yellow cupboards； her back to me as I stalked her from the shadows let the scent pull me toward her Stop！ I groaned； not able to bear more。 Sorry； she whispered； her eyes wide。 The monster rejoiced。
And the vision in her head shifted again。 An empty highway at night； the trees beside it coated in snow； flashing by at almost two hundred miles per hour。 I ll miss you； she said。 No matter how short a time you re gone。 Emmett and Rosalie exchanged an apprehensive glance。 We were almost to the turn off onto the long drive that led to our home。 Drop us here； Alice instructed。 You should tell Carlisle yourself。 I nodded； and the car squealed to a sudden stop。 Emmett； Rosalie and Jasper got out in silence； they would make Alice explain when I was gone。 Alice touched my shoulder。 You will do the right thing； she murmured。 Not a vision this time an order。 She s Charlie Swan s only family。 It would kill him； too。 Yes； I said； agreeing only with the last part。 She slid out to join the others； her eyebrows pulling together in anxiety。 melted into woods； out of sight before I could turn the car around。 They I accelerated back toward town； and I knew the visions in Alice s head would be flashing from dark to bright like a strobe light。 As I sped back to Forks doing niy； I wasn t sure where I was going。 To say goodbye to my father？ Or to embrace the monster inside me？ The road flew away beneath my tires。
2。 Open Book I leaned back against the soft snow bank； letting the dry powder reshape itself around my weight。 My skin had cooled to match the air around me； and the tiny pieces of ice felt like velvet under my skin。 The sky above me was clear； brilliant with stars； glowing blue in some places； yellow in others。 The stars created majestic； swirling shapes against the black universe an awesome sight。 Exquisitely beautiful。 Or rather； it should have been exquisite。 Would have been； if I d been able to really see it。 It wasn t getting any better。 Six days had passed； six days I d hidden here in the empty Denali wilderness； but I was no closer to freedom than I had been since the first moment that I d caught her scent。 When I stared up at the jeweled sky； it was as if there were an obstruction between my eyes and their beauty。 The obstruction was a face； just an unremarkable human face； but I couldn t quite seem to banish it from my mind。 I heard the approaching thoughts before I heard the footsteps that acpanied them。 The sound of movement was only a faint whisper against the powder。 I was not surprised that Tanya had followed me here。 I knew she d been mulling over this ing conversation for the last few days； putting it off until she was sure of exactly what she wanted to say。 She sprang into sight about sixty yards away； leaping onto the tip of an outcropping of black rock and balancing there on the balls of her bare feet。 Tanya s skin was silver in the starlight； and her long blond curls shone pale； almost pink with their strawberry tint。 Her amber eyes glinted as she spied me； halfburied in the snow； and her full lips stretched slowly into a smile。 Exquisite。 If I d really been able to see her。 I sighed。 She crouched down on the point of the stone； her fingertips touching the rock； her body coiled。 Cannonball； she thought。 She launched herself into the air； her shape became a dark； twisting shadow as she spun gracefully between me and the stars。 She curled herself into a ball just as she struck the piled snow bank beside me。 A blizzard of snow flew up around me。 in the feathery ice crystals。 The stars went black and I was buried deep I sighed again； but didn t move to unearth myself。 The blackness under the snow neither hurt nor improved the view。 I still saw the same face。 Edward？ Then snow was flying again as Tanya swiftly disinterred me。 powder from my unmoving face； not quite meeting my eyes。 She brushed the
Sorry； she murmured。 I know。 It was a joke。 It was funny。 Her mouth twisted down。 Irina and Kate said I should leave you alone。 They think I m annoying you。 Not at all； I assured her。 On the contrary； I m the one who s being rude abominably rude。 I m very sorry。 You re going home； aren t you？ she thought。 I haven t entirely decided that yet。 But you re not staying here。 No。 Her thought was wistful now； sad。 It doesn t seem to be helping。 That s my fault； isn t it？ She grimaced。 Of course not； I lied smoothly。 Don t be a gentleman。 I smiled。 I make you unfortable； she accused。 No。 She raised one eyebrow； her expression so disbelieving that I had to laugh。 short laugh； followed by another sigh。 All right； I admitted。 A little bit。 She sighed； too； and put her chin in her hands。 Her thoughts were chagrined。 One You re a thousand times lovelier than the stars； Tanya。 Of course； you re already well aware of that。 Don t let my stubbornness undermine your confidence。 I chuckled at the unlikeliness of that。 I m not used to rejection； she grumbled； her lower lip pushing out into an attractive pout。 Certainly not； I agreed； trying with little success to block out her thoughts as she fleetingly sifted through memories of her thousands of successful conquests。 Mostly Tanya preferred human men they were much more populous for one thing； with the added advantage of being soft and warm。 And always eager； definitely。 Succubus； I teased； hoping to interrupt the images flickering in her head。 She grinned； flashing her teeth。 The original。 Unlike Carlisle； Tanya and her sisters had discovered their consciences slowly。 In the end； it was their fondness for human men that turned the sisters against the slaughter。 Now the men they loved lived。 When you showed up here； Tanya said slowly。 I thought that
I d known what she d thought。 And I should have guessed that she would have felt that way。 But I hadn t been at my best for analytical thinking in that moment。 You thought that I d changed my mind。 Yes。 She scowled。 I didn t mean to I I feel horrible for toying with your expectations； Tanya。 wasn t thinking。 It s just that I left in quite a hurry。 I don t suppose you d tell me why ？ I sat up and wrapped my arms around my legs； curling defensively。 to talk about it。 I don t want Tanya； Irina and Kate were very good at this life they d mitted to。 Better； in some ways； than even Carlisle。 Despite the insanely close proximity they allowed themselves with those who should be and once were their prey； they did not make mistakes。 I was too ashamed to admit my weakness to Tanya。 Woman troubles？ she guessed； ignoring my reluctance。 I laughed a bleak laugh。 Not the way you mean it。 She was quiet then。 I listened to her thoughts as she ran through different guesses； tried to decipher the meaning of my words。 You re not even close； I told her。 One hint？ she asked。 Please let it go； Tanya。 She was quiet again； still speculating。 appreciate the stars。 I ignored her； trying in vain to She gave up after a silent moment； and her thoughts pursued a new direction。 Where will you go； Edward； if you leave？ I don t think so； I whispered。 Where would I go？ I could not think of one place on the entire pla that held any interest for me。 There was nothing I wanted to see or do。 Because； no matter where I went； I would not be going to anywhere I would only be running from。 I hated that。 When had I bee such a coward？ Back to Carlisle？ Tanya threw her slender arm around my shoulders。 I stiffened； but did not flinch out from under her touch。 She meant it as nothing more than friendly fort。 Mostly。 I think that you will go back； she said； her voice taking on just a hint of her long lost Russian accent。 No matter what it is or who it is。。。that is haunting you。 You ll face it head on。 You re the type。 Her thoughts were as certain as her words。 I tried to embrace the vision of myself that she carried in her head。 The one who faced things head on。 It was
pleasant to think of myself that way again。 I d never doubted my courage； my ability to face difficulty； before that horrible hour in a high school biology class such a